Welcome star of “Into the Badlands” Mr. Sherman Augustus, our first “The Celebrity Speaks” guest interview. Let’s stand on our feet, clap our hands and scream out with cheers while we introduce to you our first celebrity guest, Mr. Sherman Augustus.
Mr. Augustus is a producer, director, musician, actor, retired professional football player, 2nd Degree Black Belt Martial Artist in Tae Kwon Do and so much more. He agreed to sit down with Ms. E to share his thoughts about issues facing mature men when it comes to health, relationships and intimacy.
Here’s what he had to say:
FE: Given that you are a retired football player and have your 2nd degree black belt in Tae Kwon Do – you give the impression that you’re very athletic and regularly work out. What advice would you give to other men when it comes to keeping their body fit as they age?
SA: Find time to take a walk whether that’s for 15, 20 or 35 minutes a day. It’s the little things that you do. Watch your diet and what you eat. You know your inside being is able to relate to you exactly how you feel and what you’re capable of. You don’t necessarily have to do the track work out that you did in high school. You may not be able to do 25 pull ups anymore, you know, five is good. You may not be able to do 25 pushups, ten is good. Do everything in moderation. And even those who are fit have to take a day off, not only a day off but have a light workout that day or plan the workouts to where you know you’re gonna’ have a light day. So there really is no excuse, I mean you can’t use “I’m too busy”, you’re not gonna’ be too busy for that heart attack. And then again, we can talk about diet, it depends on what you want, but you can still eat what you want as long as it’s in moderation and you’re still exercising. It’s simple, it’s not brain surgery at all.
FE: What role does physical conditioning play in successful relationships?
SA: Well again, from my personal opinion, if you feel good about yourself you’re going to be outgoing more, you’re going to be able to relate to others more, you’re not going to be in a shell. If you feel like I got a droopy left eyelid kind of thing and that’s on the outside, you may not want to approach different people all the time. You may not be as, you know, I have a lot of friends who can speak and talk to anybody at any time. They’re very outgoing and I feel that when you’re insecure about yourself, being on the inside, you’re not that forthcoming with folks. It’s all about how you feel and how you perceive your ownself. So again, it just goes back to doing something for yourself to make yourself feel good because you’re not responsible for nobody else feeling good. But if you feel good about yourself that’s going to radiate. Even if you have those days when you don’t and you still force yourself to have a smile and greet that next person and you notice at some point you’re going to be back to what you feel is your normal self.
FE: So the next five questions are pertaining to relationships. What are mature men looking for when it comes to finding a companion?
SA: So again, we have to stay with this whole theme, someone who’s secure within themselves. I just finished having this conversation with some friends of mine that were on Young and the Restless with me. I feel personally if a woman can give me mental stimulation, in other words that means a conversation about anything, about tires, it could be anything. I don’t need to have a woman that’s gotta’ be knowledgeable in football, I used to say that as a kid, she better know how to break down if it’s third and five and there’s fifteen, you know a minute five on the clock and what are they gonna run? I don’t need to know that…but, just someone who can hold a conversation and if I ask “what books are you reading right now, what was the last book you read?” and you can give me a summary of something of that book. And it’s vice versa, I don’t think any women want to have a non-intelligent human being hanging around them. So for me it’s always about what the mind, what that individual has in their mind and where they’re coming from.
FE: How does aging affect what men look for in a relationship?
SA: You don’t want anyone that’s very immature and still wants to, let’s say for instance, not run the streets, but it’s important to go to this place and it’s important to be seen over here and that kind of thing. One of the most gratifying things to me is if we can stay home and just watch a movie and just chill. It’s just one of those moments like you’re in the same room but it seems like you’re still by yourself kind of thing. But you have your significant other/person there with you, that those are always cool, those are always cool.
FE: What should women expect when it comes to dating a mature man?
SA: Someone that’s not playing any games, that has direction, knows exactly who they are, what they are and what they are trying to achieve in their lives. Just feels that way about other people, you can always gauge, that’s a pretty simple question. You know, you being a woman you know what you want in a man. Someone caring, someone thoughtful, someone that has your back, ya’ know, at the drop of a second, “hey ran out of gas and I’m over here someplace.” I’ll be there as soon as I can.
FE: What are the biggest relationship challenges that couples face?
SA: Trust…trust, that would be number one on my list. But again, that trust comes from and this goes back to everything else we’ve been talking about, this touches on, those two individuals per se’, you know my responsibility is not to make you happy. I’m not basically there to give you your happiness. You already brought that into the relationship. We have to be adults and we have to achieve that together and in order to do that we need to have joy in our lives our own selves and who we are and that’s kinda’ hard when you’re working on a job or you’re trying to get a job, or you know, you’re low on money or whatever, you have to balance these things. There’s always a ying and a yang, so if I can just tow the middle of the line there, because there’s no grey area or black area or white area, it’s just a grey area and we’re all human beings and we’re all striving to do this and we’re only here for a hot second so why should we spend our time debating over just nonsense?
FE: What works when it comes to a successful relationship?
SA: Everything. When it’s firing on all cylinders you know it’s right. I think also when folks get together, if they’re friends and they get that with each other, that works too. And that just makes everything else, because that’s what it is, and then you throw the intimacy on top of all that, but you know if we’re friends, that’s what matters. There’s ex-girlfriends that if they need me, I’m there, whatever you need, I’m there. Whatever I need to do for you, I got you. And it’s not because of anything else, it’s just because we were always friends and we’re friends. Period.
FE: And that’s the security, if I can kind of piggyback on that, that’s the security that another woman would have to have with that kind of engagement. And they have to understand, it’s just that…we’re friends.
SA: Yeah exactly, we’re friends and I got you. We love each other, we’re friends, we were intimate with one another but still we walked away friends. And it’s not about ownership, that’s one thing my parents taught me years ago, that you don’t own an individual. I don’t own you. You’re not my possession, ok? I cannot stop anything that’s happening, I don’t have a magic spice, she goes over here and a dude’s over there and he’s gonna mack to her and he has long hair…ya’ know, come on man, listen, have at it, because if you’re my friend you’re gonna say “you know what, hey listen, hold on, I’m good.” And it’s vice versa, it’s vice versa.
